The Contextual Gap in Words

The same can mean different things to different people so how does one bridge the gap to create understanding?

When I say I love optimization and building systems, it means a love of building adaptable and flexible systems. A love for creating the highest ROI for inputs like time and effort for outputs that can be qualitative like fulfillment and a sense of achievement or quantitative like financial $$ or hitting some milestone, etc…

However, such words are taken as toxic by others who might assume I must be rigid, mechanical, logical (which some see as also being inflexible), and unsympathetic.

Take a simple word like ‘passion’. People will write books on the topic of why passion matters and some will write books that cite how it’s such an awful word and people will build careers on the word passion while others build careers pushing people away from the word passion.

“Ambition" can be seen as a strength but also a possible weakness and categorization for someone who is cutthroat, type-A, and narrow-minded.

Furthermore, "Type-A" could be a compliment or an insult. The list goes on and I think you get the rough picture I’m painting.

It became a point of repeated struggle as I built out OMDV. As I sought to figure out what I wanted the site to be, I also experimented a lot with what words to use. Words that were influenced by books and lectures of people I respected. Words that I would receive unsolicited feedback from and realize that everyone had a different opinion of the same words but no one was in my shoes.

It also became apparent that everyone has an opinion on specific words and they will endow their judgment on those who speak such words. Judgment that ignores the context of the sayer but only considers the context of the listener.

It is unfair? 100%. But then again, so is life right?

But it’s been something that has troubled me as, eventually, when I actually speak at length with people about what they really stand for and why they don’t like certain words while liking others, I often find there are many similarities in values and it is merely a different choice of words. One person uses ‘passion’ while another uses ‘purpose’ and another uses ‘why’ and another uses ‘calling’ and some will cite the technical difference of each but many seem to refer to similar things.

So how can I bridge the gap? The simple solution seems embedded in the phrase: Actions speak louder than words.

To ignore the differences in the contextual definition of words, one must look at actions. However, is it not words that one uses to describe the actions and the intention behind them?

Maybe actions are merely the first step to a longer process. Not a means to an end but for a new beginning. It’s the action that might bring someone in closer for them to get curious about the actor’s words. To understand the context willingly. I think only then will the two engage in a lengthy discussion that transcends mere words but into a conscious conversation about what both individuals stand for and how this action has united them. Maybe that’s how they can overcome the obstacle of contextual definitions.